When It's Time For Letting Go
Have you ever tried to change something about yourself and found it difficult to do?
And is it even possible that at some level you even sabotaged your efforts? Why is change so hard? What is it that keeps us so stuck in our same old patterns?
Life becomes "Groundhog Day" where we repeat patterns of behavior over and over again, stimuli and response. Every day seems a repeat of the one before. You get in a rut and can't get out of it. They say a rut is just a grave with the sides kicked out. A life of sameness is a slow death.
These patterns are hard to change because they exist at our deepest level of being. They exist deep within our subconscious. While we consciously may want to do something different, we are locked into a set response due to the programming our subconscious. Limiting beliefs and negative thoughts keep us stuck. We created these patterns to help us survive emotional trauma.
For most of us, it started in our childhood. It was here that our parents (without knowing any better) taught us conditional love. It was here that we learned that love can hurt, that it can be judgmental, manipulative, guilt ridden, jealous and possessive. As a result, we formed certain judgments that allowed us to put our life into perspective. It is these judgments that we carried forward as we got older. Year after year we built on them and reinforced them so that they became belief patterns. Patterns like, I am not lovable or I don't deserve love.
One pattern that I had a long time getting over is the illusory power I found in being a victim. I found that when I acted hurt and framed myself as a victim then I got attention and "love" from another. This love was illusory, of course, but it didn't matter to me. I viewed it as real even though it was manipulative and conditional. This pattern caused me to create situations where I would position myself as a victim in the hopes of getting attention. It was childish and manipulative but it is how I orchestrated my life. If someone didn't play my game, I was even more manipulative until I got what I wanted. Stimuli... Response. And so it goes in accordance with natural law ... as within so without. Our inner life creates our outer life and my outer life was not a happy one since my inner life was in chaos.
We all frame reality around our thought patterns and beliefs as well as creating situations to support them. This is one reason we always respond the same way to the same stimuli. We become very predictable and change becomes very hard. Another reason that change is so hard was identified by Candace Pert of "What the Bleep" fame. She has proven that this conditioned response is actually a chemical addiction within our body. When faced with a given stimuli our body is triggered to produce certain chemicals that we can become addicted to. It is no wonder it is hard to change.
But all this can be undone. And change can actually be easy. And this is the perfect time of year to do so. Life moves in cycles. The planet does and so do we. We are going through many cycles simultaneously but one of the most powerful ones is the change of the seasons. In December fall ends and winter begins. All of life follows the major cycle of Life/Death/Life. Life comes from death and death feeds life. The food we eat was once alive, and it gave its life for us to live. The trees at this time of year lose their leaves as they too die. The leaves ultimately become food again in the form of composted soil. All of life goes through this cycle. There is no escaping it. Darkness settles on the planet as December 21 arrives, the darkest day of the year.
You can use this cycle for your benefit. Just as the trees give away their leaves to provide growth and life, you too can make a giveaway. At this time of year take time to reflect on your life. Go deep! Find out what your limiting beliefs are. Make a list of the possibilities. Do not judge them. Just accept them. And then just as the trees let go of their leaves, you too can let go. All you need to do is to let go of just one judgment or limiting belief. This is not always easy for you must create a new paradigm of how your life works.
When Marconi invented the wireless radio, he told his family and friends that he could talk to people without wires. They thought he was mad and had him committed to a mental institution. Only when he demonstrated the technology could they accept it as true and had him released. They had no framework for accepting this paradigm as being possible. You must create a new paradigm for yourself. It begins by understanding the power of your thoughts and embracing what is hidden in our subconscious.
This is not easy. Your ego mind will want to keep you trapped where you are so it can remain in control. It will create fear. Fear is often the hardest thing to overcome, but my experience shows that every time I face my fear and step into it two things happen: 1) it is never as bad as it seemed and 2) I am better for it. It is like a muscle; the more you use it the easier it is to do it again. So the more you step in and face the fear, the easier it becomes. I actually look forward to it now for I know that great things are in store for me when I face my fear.
The holidays are a busy time, but surely you can find 15-30 minutes every few days over the next month to reflect. Go deep. Find out what beliefs limit you and let go of them. This process is very liberating. The forces of the planet are with you and you will be in the flow with them. Most people report feeling freer and lighter as a result of this process. They feel like a weight has been lifted from their shoulders.
Letting will also help you with your New Year's Resolutions. Very few people stick with their resolutions and manifest their desires. It is often because their limiting beliefs are holding them back. By letting go, you will have fertilized the soil and weeded the garden of your soul. Next month in January's issue, we will discuss how to more effectively manifest your New Year's Resolutions. But know this ... letting go is the first step.
May the Life/Death/Life cycle of the entire Universe bless you with the energy of letting go. May your ego mind step aside to allow you to see yourself for who you truly are. May you let go of that which no longer serves. May peace and love reign in your heart this holiday season.
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Thank you!